mother, father and child sitting
Family & Lifestyle

Parenting – Am I doing it right?

Mother, father and child sitting on a tree trunk with a multi coloured blanket over them

A recent visit to see some family unexpectedly made me question whether we’re doing things correctly when it comes to bringing up our baby. As a parent, I frequently question myself and find myself calling my mum for advice or turning to Google to find out whether I should be waking little one up from her longer than usual nap or to see whether her dry skin could be eczema. The answers being ‘don’t wake a sleeping baby’ and ‘no, probably not.’

During our visit, my other half happened to mention that we rock baby to sleep before putting her in her cot. The family were shocked at this, saying we should be putting her in her cot and leaving her to self settle and fall asleep of her own accord. Finding myself getting defensive and feeling like my parenting skills were being questioned, I stated that we’d tried that and that she just hurts herself by rolling into the side of the cot and banging her head over and over again. Bumpers were then suggested and I advised I don’t like them due to the risk of suffocation.

Before we were leaving for the hour long journey back, we were asked if we were going to put her in her pyjamas. I hadn’t even contemplated bringing her pyjamas with us and I felt bad for not thinking about making her as comfortable as possible during the journey home.

I continued to question whether we were parenting wrong over the next few days, so a couple of nights later I decided to put her in her cot while she was awake to see if she would fall asleep on her own. She didn’t. Nor did she show any signs that that’s what she was even contemplating going to sleep. Instead, she opted to roll onto her front and practice her crawling technique, bashing her head several times in the process, because what better time to try to crawl when you’re snug in a sleeping bag in your cot? Surely, this was all the evidence I needed that leaving her to her own devices in her cot was doing her more harm than good?

I’m still not 100% sure of my abilities, but is any parent? Don’t we all have wobbly moments when we question whether we’re doing it right? What I do know, though, is that wherever I go, someone somewhere has got an opinion on the way me and my partner should be bringing up our baby. Whilst we appreciate their help and them sharing their experiences, we’ve been doing things ‘our way’ so far and using our gut instinct and so far everything seems to be going well. She’s rolling, she’s attempting to crawl, she’s found her voice and she’s taken to weaning very well, so surely my partner and I are doing something right?

Me, Being Mummy

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  1. You are doing a brilliant job, please don't doubt yourself. I found myself feeling like this a lot when I had my eldest, but second time round I have learnt to smile and nod but still do what I think is best. No such thing as perfect parenting so, really, none of us are 100% right OR wrong. As long as you do the best job you can and that you are all happy then that is all that matters. Don't feel bad about the PJs. My son had to ride home in just his nappy the other week because I forgot spare clothes in case of emergencies. Thank god for the heater in the car being on full blast and his Dad's hoodie on his lap! Thank you for linking up with #HoneybeeLinky lovely, see you next week I hope! xxx

  2. Thank you! 🙂

  3. You're doing an amazing job! What is the right way? As long as everyone is happy and healthy, that's the right way. I rocked my first born to sleep every night, vowed I wouldn't with our second, I didn't – I stroked her leg to sleep every night! That crawling stage is a hard one at bedtime – who wants to sleep when they can practise crawling??? We had this at every stage – sitting, crawling, standing, walking. It's just what happens. My little girl sings at bedtime now, just like her brother did. I take no notice of what people say, I do what works for us. #HoneybeeLinky

  4. Thank you for your comment, Jo. I like the sound of every family doing what works best for them 🙂

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